The Psychic Octopus II – This time it’s miffed!!

WARNING!! _ Do not watch the clip below. I mean it, it’s worse than the horror show that we shall henceforth obliquely refer to as ; “The thing that happened in January”.


As I write this Andy Morrell’s Tamworth have won eleven games in a row. He must be the greatest manager ever, the stats are staring us in the face. Tamworth have gone from relegation favourites to outsiders for the title. He’s been better at producing results than Paul the Octopus was at predicting them. (Andy- 11 out of 11, Paul 9 out of 10).  What fools we were to let this genius go! I’m walking round the room wringing my hands and wailing. If only I had begged him to stay. If only he was still here the save us from relegation, oblivion, and a UKIP win in the General Election. We’re stuck with numbnuts Wilkin and his band of duffy duffers. Why is life so cruel to me, is it due to the wicked thoughts I harboured for Sue Lawley all those years ago?

The object of Congy’s desires


My wife says I’m a drama queen. I tend to overreact to situations, but wouldn’t you if your beloved kept leaving the teabag in the cup too long? I have no explanation for  ‘ The thing that happened in January’, but I am capable, after a little time to recover my composure, of putting our situation in perspective. We are a mid-table Conference team ,with a learning manager, and a group of players made up of pros in the last-chance saloon and youngsters wondering if they can make it in the game. The pressure to perform is near overwhelming, and the results of failure is the end to a personal dream for every squad member. For all our playing staff failure is going part-time, or giving up entirely. A cup game must be a blessed relief.

The first Octopus-themed article I wrote was a delightfully nuanced and fascinating look at how it is possible to misinterpret football results and come to the wrong conclusions. If you look at a short period of time you haven’t got sufficient data to make a decision. As a rule of thumb, statisticians don’t like using less than 50 results to draw conclusions from.

Andy Morrell was guilty at Wrexham of failing to shape events to such an extent that he felt the need to resign. Kevin Wilkin is capable of making a Premiership manager (Mark Hughes) confess to thinking his team was going out The Cup to non-league opposition, and getting Nuneaton to a league position of dizzying heights. Judging over a short period it is difficult to decide which has the numbest nuts.

Andy Morrell won’t be getting ahead of himself at Tamworth. He knows he hasn’t discovered the secret of eternal success, but it’s clear he learnt at Wrexham how to turn round a bad run. He is undoubtedly using those lessons at Tamworth. Kevin Wilkin has learnt a vast amount in the last two weeks. It would be great if we reaped the benefit of those lessons, and maybe the warmer weather might alleviate any numbness he might be feeling!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s