Another epic guest post from Congy Red: this time it’s personal!
After a lull in proceedings on the pitch I thought I would take a break from writing hard hitting, incisive articles to bring a bit of glamour into the lives of ordinary supporters. We journos work desperately hard to bring you the unbiased truth, but we also take very seriously the need to boost the morale of the Nation in times of hardship. Here’s my report on a fabulous gala evening that may have missed your attention.
My personal invitation to the Caia Park Country Club from the event sponsors Nandos Chicken was gratefully received. The evening was to pay homage to one of the unsung heroes of our great club, and was packed with his friends from sport and the celebrity stratosphere. We were there to celebrate the winning of the Pulitzer Trophy for The Best Journalist Writing in their Second Language in the North Wales Area. You probably already know, but the prize was won by our own former Welsh International goalkeeping legend and media darling Mark ‘Griff’, ‘Griffy’, ‘Griffo’, ‘The Griffalo’, Griffiths.
The sponsors provided a sumptous spread of their delicious fare, as the higher echelons chatted easily about their lives. The event came briefly to a standstill when Jay Harris made an entrance to gasps from the crowd. He was accompanied by two statuesque blondes, one on each arm , towering above him. My view was slightly obscured, but I think the blondes were Dean Keates and Elliot Durrell. Another incident of note saw Mark Creighton avoid causing embarrassment by a hair’s breadth. When chatting to Keith Harris he accidentally mistook Orville for a piece of chicken and ate him! Keith dealt with the incident with the consummate ease of a professional by laughing, and stating he preferred working with the monkey with the sniff anyway.
After the meal we were entertained by a David Dickinson tribute act, with a real tan and fake antiques, before Mark was presented by his award by Sir Trevor McDonald to tumultuous applause. Mark spoke touchingly about his sporting career and how he had been a great admirer of David Icke, the former Hereford goalkeeper, and how, after a chance meeting of the two, Mark had become what he described as a ‘disciple’ of Ickes. Their careers followed an uncannily similar trajectory, through goalkeeping success , slowly making a career in journalism and onto a shared belief in an alien lizard master race controlling the earth.
It’s always a pleasure to spend an evening with so many of my talented friends. I do so hope you have enjoyed a window into our world, and perhaps it has inspired you to try that little bit harder so perhaps one day you can join us.